Paul Dolan, a British psychologist and professor at the London School of Economics, comments that women who don’t have children or even partners are the happiest. They can dedicate more time of their life to themselves, being healthier to the extent that they have more time to dedicate to their health care.

In Colombia there is an increasing number of women who do not want to become mothers. According to statistics from the Department of National Statistics (DANE), from 2015 to 2021 there was a decrease in the birth rate of 7.8%.

Jorge Cabezas, an economist, member of the DANE census and demography area and responsible for fertility issues, assures that this figure has been reduced not only in Colombia but globally: between 1950 and 1960, the average number of children per woman was around six, and today the fertility rate is 1.95 children per woman. “There we see the magnitude of the reduction that has occurred since the 1960s.”

Luisa Álvarez is 33 years old, she is a business administrator and a member of the aircraft crew. Carolina Gómez, 42, is a psychologist, with a Master’s degree in human resource management and directing, and is currently head of recruitment for Grupo Cristal. Laura Echeverry is a publicist specializing in consumer psychology. All three are women who have made the decision not to become mothers. Álvarez, for reasons that go back to his childhood. Gómez doesn’t want responsibility, and Echeverry doesn’t want to be forced to live up to standards or be portrayed as a good or bad mother.

Luisa María Álvarez was born in Medellin. He has been a member of the flight crew at Avianca for 10 years. When he was little, he listened to his mother being late from work. He is an employee in an office. He did it to get them going, since his father was never around, because he and his sister were born out of wedlock. His mother came home to clean. I sweep, mop, wash my school uniform to get it ready for the next day. I make them food. All this after a long working day. I’m under a lot of stress. That is what Álvarez remembers best from his childhood.

He didn’t judge his mother. But she remembers well the comments she made about motherhood: “How tired. A person with children must often kill himself. Children are expensive.” When they didn’t behave properly, their mothers complained that they were disobedient. Today’s flight attendant said that the fear of having children was created in her. I thought: “If I had them, I would have to work a lot, kill myself; If I had children, they would pay me badly. And although I later understood that everyone has different situations, that didn’t make me change my mind.

Psychologist Gabriela Pazmiño explains that childhood has a lot to do with decisions for the future. “Sigmund Freud said that it doesn’t matter what you decide to do, because in the subconscious there will always be a living and sensitive core that we carry with us from childhood.” In addition, Pazmiño said that the decision of a woman like Luisa Álvarez may be a desire to improve herself, because she does not want another human being to experience what she went through. Both he and his sister underwent tubectomies, permanent tubal ligations, where instead of tying them up, they burned them.

Every year more women than men choose permanent methods of contraception. According to Profamilia data referred to by Manifiesta, in 2017 37,970 tubal ligations and 13,215 vasectomy were performed. In 2018, ligations increased to 41,315, while vasectomies were 16,026. These numbers continued to increase until the pandemic arrived in 2020. 29,465 ligatures and 13,459 vasectomies in the year of confinement, which was explained by the quarantine and difficulty accessing the health system directly.

The results of I-SHARE, a study in Colombia led by the University of Gant, Belgium, and the London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine in England, showed that 80% of women surveyed (2,444) admitted to having an active sexual life and being users of contraceptive methods. But 14% had difficulty accessing this method during the pandemic due to fear of contracting it and because of its rarity.

Carolina Gómez joins the trend of women who don’t want to have children, despite having doubted it for several years. She is one of the women of the Motherless movement. He owned a farm on the outskirts of Medellín. Five dogs, seven horses and lots of plants all around. For now, he feels fine with the responsibility.

In the trunk of his truck he always carries a suitcase filled with clothes, toothbrush, toothpaste, swimsuit, sandals and sunscreen. Because he is always ready for any sudden trip that comes his way. For him it is important to have a stable partner in terms of having children and the right partner has yet to arrive. He didn’t want that, if he had it with anyone, divorce came later and with it the typical fights about money and kids.

He didn’t want to add to the DANE statistics showing that currently in Colombia 40% of households are headed by a woman. And while experts like Jairo Sojo, publicist and professor, assure that the media phenomenon of Prince Charming’s death is experienced today, because women are “super strong”, there are others like Gómez who still feel this figure is necessary to raise a family. Psychologist Pazmiño confirms that most women tend to reconsider their decision to become mothers. Even those who have already had it are still wondering whether they want to have more children. “Motherhood is desire and desire is ambiguous,” she explains.

Laura Echeverry is not a mother nor does she plan to be one. Thinking that in society they always make a standard to know if a woman is a good mother. According to Paul Dolan, “these social pressures can lead people to have children, even if it’s not in their best interest.” Echeverry decided to help people in need. She didn’t know if she could be the perfect mother everyone painted her to be. And he doesn’t want to know. He said that his final decision was made as a couple.

Throughout his life he experienced social pressure. Seven years ago she wanted her tubes tied, but was questioned by her obstetrician. Because of this, she did not undergo surgery, but she plans to do so, because she “is the one who rules her life, inside her body.”

Gynecologist Javier Castro, who specializes in laparoscopic surgery, commented that healthcare professionals have an obligation to provide patients with the necessary contraceptive information to find the ideal method for each woman, and that it is unethical to interfere in a patient’s decision.

So, cases like Echeverry, Gómez and Álvarez illustrate why this growing trend. And it remains to be seen whether the trend in Colombia continues to pick up, having been interrupted by the pandemic. The DANE figures for the year will be revealed if the curve continues and, in this case, the analysis of causes and implications, in our country, continues to be a pending task.